Growing Pains & Boundaries

I remember when I was a child, my Dad would warn me not to do something because he said I could get hurt. Of course, as a child, I would test my boundaries and try to exert some of my will and ignore the warning. Inevitably, I would get hurt. He would scoop me up and (along with Mom's help) tend to my wounds, whether it be a knee or elbow or just my pride. After the wounds were bandaged and the tears were wiped away, my Dad would look down, close his eyes and shake his head back and forth and ask me why I hadn't listened and obeyed his warning. I remember this look vividly as if he were sitting in front of me now. Of course, I had the classic childhood answer of "I don't know Daddy." And now, 20 plus years later, I find myself giving my own daughter the same warnings and inevitably having the same conversation with her after she's gotten hurt. I just sit and wonder, "Why didn't she listen to me? Now she's hurting and upset! I told her what would happen and she did it anyway and now she's hurt!" Not a situation where it's good to be right or throw out an "I told you so".

Don't you think that's what God must feel like? I mean, he gave us a whole instruction manual of warnings to heed, instructions to follow, examples to live by and Godly men and women to mirror ourselves after. But time and again, we don't heed the warnings, follow the instructions or examples or model ourselves after the spiritual giants that have come before us. Sometimes I feel like He's shaking his head a little with it bowed in His lap like my Dad used to do. But I know He doesn't judge me, He just picks me up, dusts me off and sets me right again. No "I told you so" or "Why did you go and do that after I told you that would cause you harm". Nope. Just love. And acceptance. I still have to pay the consequences, but I know that He still loves me and I'm still His and made in His image. And He's still working on me. I know there will be many times in the future that He and I will complete this ritual, because I am a sinner. I'm still growing, and these are my growing pains. But I know He'll be walking with me, and when I don't heed His warnings, He'll be right there to pick me up, dust me off and set me right again, with no judgements. Just love. And acceptance.

Becoming a parent has given me a fresh new look at my God. Especially now when Daughter is testing those boundaries that Hubby and I have set in place and learning how to use her will. You don't want your kids to get hurt, you want them to trust you when you tell them not to do something, for if they do, something bad could happen. You don't want to be right in those situations. Neither does God. You don't want to see them hurt or in pain. Neither does God. You just want your children to trust you, listen to you and obey. And that's what God wants. He wants us to be the people He created us to be. Not our vision of what we want our life to be. His vision for our life.